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1.赌城边上的一个生意人在街上碰到一个衣着不齐的流浪汉一样的人。 那人向生意人诉苦道：“先生，您能施舍我50块钱吗？我已经有两天两夜没有吃饭了。” 生意人瞥了一眼四周密密麻麻排列着的DC，怀疑地问道：“我怎么知道你不会拿这钱去赌？” 那人急忙辩道：“不会的！赌的钱我已经要到了！”
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2.有一个赌棍，每次DB都会带自己的女友去，而且每次都会赢!有一天女友终于按捺不住了，问男友：“你怎么每次赌都带我去，是不是想用我的美色勾引他们?”
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男友不屑地回答道：“你想哪儿去了，我带你去是吓他们的!”
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3.老公爱打MJ，有天上小学的女儿对他说：老湿说打麻将是Dubo，会被JC抓走的。0 T5 k/ h! q( E, c: e9 p& M |
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老公：怕啥呀，万一我被判刑了，你可以给老爸送饭啊。3 |! c: r: H2 \5 }+ l5 @0 J# I
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女儿同情地说：万一判死刑呢。。。
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笑死我了。。。& ^% `% f5 d2 ?
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4.我的一个小外甥女，有一次接她放学回家，
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8 X- x2 u V' K* Z2 } ?可能是饿了，一回家就要吃饭，1 E- z# h" _& S
, a h& V i' [; z我就想逗逗她:小妞妞，想吃饭要背三字经给舅舅听哦，不然没饭吃哦!6 P7 t* c7 a" Z) ^- h) ]5 s
L3 \. S4 }9 V, h9 l她一听急了张口就来:人之初，性本善，要读书，先吃饭!
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% G) T6 m2 b4 Y. b% o晚上，孩子趴在桌子上写日记：“夜深了，妈妈仍在打MJ，爸爸仍在上网……”, m( y( d. O) p* S/ A2 ]$ i! T
j# z7 _! i, |; Q. z) v6 d8 Z恰巧爸爸走了过来，看到孩子写的这句话，有点不高兴，0 C$ Y/ m1 q* ]0 z6 l
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就教育孩子说：“日记不能照搬生活，要源于生活，高于生活!”
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孩子听了，马上修改为：“夜深了，妈妈仍在DB，爸爸仍在网恋…# N- K& T1 N O1 H0 U
. g! I9 K& {0 M3 d3 q! B0 [5.两天输掉十多万了，我一天的固定收入才四千，
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我不能再沉迷于DB了，该找个姑娘过正常人的生活了！% L: X$ A+ T6 s
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一女看我留言后:你若能改，我愿意做你女朋友。( Y+ F+ k- J% @4 t7 v
3 i" [) v7 ]" j# ?- X' W. o; D% T当晚我俩见面开房，睡后，躺床上女问我：你是做什么生意的？1 C" L5 ^2 a: K/ J9 w
7 I' C* Z9 X2 w我，无业闲人一个。
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女:扯淡，那怎么每天收入四千？% P# t% ?' b3 `; @5 a
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我说的是欢乐豆，一天就能领四千豆。
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女：滚她妈犊子，滚…
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当前离线
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