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1.赌城边上的一个生意人在街上碰到一个衣着不齐的流浪汉一样的人。 那人向生意人诉苦道：“先生，您能施舍我50块钱吗？我已经有两天两夜没有吃饭了。” 生意人瞥了一眼四周密密麻麻排列着的DC，怀疑地问道：“我怎么知道你不会拿这钱去赌？” 那人急忙辩道：“不会的！赌的钱我已经要到了！”6 y# F) o. ~$ ] W0 S: x' v
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2.有一个赌棍，每次DB都会带自己的女友去，而且每次都会赢!有一天女友终于按捺不住了，问男友：“你怎么每次赌都带我去，是不是想用我的美色勾引他们?”
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# {! n9 G7 q- r; ~7 \男友不屑地回答道：“你想哪儿去了，我带你去是吓他们的!”
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3 N5 Y) w3 u4 q. Q3.老公爱打MJ，有天上小学的女儿对他说：老湿说打麻将是Dubo，会被JC抓走的。
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5 Q7 H1 V; W- u& [' a老公：怕啥呀，万一我被判刑了，你可以给老爸送饭啊。) q \. Z1 M6 B/ h: V( z
. r& o8 V k0 s! g2 U9 j! W女儿同情地说：万一判死刑呢。。。 \! {( }0 `: b
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笑死我了。。。7 V. ^* C& ~+ y- Z0 q9 r
+ e# e- z+ S1 g! x7 G" _4.我的一个小外甥女，有一次接她放学回家，% r' G3 \& Y2 ~) x6 K- i
% f3 A( c( N& f6 m可能是饿了，一回家就要吃饭，# t* K$ I% S$ @/ O
( [3 Q: T4 }+ X我就想逗逗她:小妞妞，想吃饭要背三字经给舅舅听哦，不然没饭吃哦!
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她一听急了张口就来:人之初，性本善，要读书，先吃饭!
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6 E, a; Q2 W8 h2 L" ^8 l. `' }1 [晚上，孩子趴在桌子上写日记：“夜深了，妈妈仍在打MJ，爸爸仍在上网……”" V& x* x8 {' D, Z/ M0 w
- w% u% j' g' k+ W+ J2 r恰巧爸爸走了过来，看到孩子写的这句话，有点不高兴，
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7 Z. e/ z+ ~& V就教育孩子说：“日记不能照搬生活，要源于生活，高于生活!”) Y# H, V; b% f0 P$ H" g
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孩子听了，马上修改为：“夜深了，妈妈仍在DB，爸爸仍在网恋…& Z5 {& S* E& h# U8 S$ `
5 q. S2 [$ y! D8 ^3 W3 s) _5.两天输掉十多万了，我一天的固定收入才四千，. ~8 @9 N3 |8 ^
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我不能再沉迷于DB了，该找个姑娘过正常人的生活了！6 O9 R, Z) p+ u( o" `2 n2 J) D, t: D* ]
' j, L3 w1 [1 q9 i, B一女看我留言后:你若能改，我愿意做你女朋友。+ K0 |! M7 a1 l; z7 R' h
2 Y9 I' D2 P* |% T6 b当晚我俩见面开房，睡后，躺床上女问我：你是做什么生意的？
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; h: U. M: [' c; W. J6 m. M# t我，无业闲人一个。& v" B& p8 t! b0 {7 z
# q$ P; i. x9 M/ k* q, ^女:扯淡，那怎么每天收入四千？
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2 { b# I( |$ z' @我说的是欢乐豆，一天就能领四千豆。# R* j( S/ a3 q c, b8 [- a; V
+ ?; z: m2 h6 j: l6 z3 m女：滚她妈犊子，滚…( Y x; I: k- f; P) h8 K/ o) R
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当前离线
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