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大庄家娱乐城祝教师节快乐——教师节段子
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带起节奏，送来欢乐# \' }8 {$ {/ u% ]/ d8 Q) g
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' k5 Y* P4 m$ y) W! C4 V( d+ y今天是教师节，大家一起来发段子吧！
5 w0 T$ e2 P' }4 f) ~2 K5 B9 A) n R我先来！
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A说：“今天考试我交了白卷。”Ｂ说：“哎，我也交了白卷。”
o0 s1 g* h0 m% r8 H) M5 h8 b' j: I9 Q同学Ａ生气的说：“你怎么能交白卷呢，老师会以为我们抄袭的！”
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深夜，王老师批改完最后一份试卷，疲惫地拧开了收音机，想听音乐放松一下。收音机里传来了dj的声音："xx中学高三级x班全班同学一同把这首歌奉献给他们敬爱的王xx老师听，感谢他多年来给他们出了无数道练习题(尤其是这年)，使他们得到了宝贵的练习机会……"听到这，王老师的眼睛湿润了，心力交瘁的脸上露出一安慰的笑意。dj又继续说："……现在就让我们一起来听这首歌，李惠敏的《你不会有好结果》…"
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# w0 W/ G7 b& @$ t* @; Y5 h一位年轻女教师初次执教小学生美术课。她在黑板上画一个苹果问学生说：“这是什么呀？”学生异口同声回答：“是屁股。”女教师哭着去找校长，校长一听大怒，跟着老师来到教室训斥学生说：“你们越来越不像话了，为什么又把老师气哭了？”回头看了一看“啊！还在黑板上画了个屁股！” <span] 老师去吃自助餐] 昨天老妈教弟弟做作业，弟弟不动脑筋思考，
2 `& Z6 M: @' X$ o' S每道题都问妈妈，妈妈怒了：“你每道题都不会，干脆我帮你做算了！”
/ V4 _6 x6 u9 I! [% G8 ~& g弟弟淡淡地说：“不行！字迹不一样会被老师发现的！” <span] 考场上一女生抱怨说：“老师，天气太热了，风扇都没风！”谁料老师说：“别急，等会儿看到试卷你就心凉了。” <span] 一帅哥毕业后到一所女子学校任教，由于年轻的男老师级少，
2 z% c w" d' U6 Y6 ?" ^所以非常受欢迎。
4 d v% ?" _( B$ M/ i/ j第一堂课，有一位女学生忘记带课本，帅哥老师请她站起来，
( {/ ]0 T' A g问其他同学该怎么处罚。她们很有默契的齐声说：“老师亲她一个！”2 s; @) s* c0 F& i+ @
大家等着看老师的反应。老师瞄了那位同学一眼，
% ?- E1 O6 y- F8 h( `9 c2 I回答：“不可以处罚老师！” <span] 今天听见两个老师在讨论管理上课吃东西的事情说：
! ?, H5 f" B- w" e, y& f4 b有个学生老在我上课的时候偷吃瓜子，我毫不客气，见一次抓一次，一抓就是一大把！！！
; F s n0 h4 G6 `, v7 {7 f不知道是不是我的错，那个上课吃东西的学生，被我抓过几次，但最近一两个月都没看过他上课吃东西了，我整个人瘦了很多。 <span] 一小学教师，最近在学车却不怎么喜欢去练车，教练问：“为什么经常没来学车？”' S/ z% S5 r; L- U/ U2 _
她：“在学校都是我骂学生，来你这边老是被你骂，我很不爽！！！” <span] 上高中嘴馋，几个同学合计买烧烤吃，不想带回来的时候被班主任发现没收了，结果第二天班主任闹了一天的肚子。 <span] 生物老师非洲野猪
, f5 x+ c4 v; e$ v; z" v生物老师正兴致勃勃在台上描述非洲野猪的长相，偶尔眼光一扫台下，竟发现多数学生在打瞌睡。
3 u' [( c, T$ w! D于是大为恼火，喝道：“你们要看着我啊!不看我，你们怎么知道非洲野猪长的是什么样子?” <span] 老师：小明，你的美劳作品太好了，明天学校要派你参加全市的比赛。1 r# f: n9 p9 [1 R J+ z( w- E
小明：不行5 u/ O. w7 g" u Y, s g
老师：為什麼？/ i* ~7 ^% q& ]/ H+ N8 K8 W* W
小明：劳作是我爸做的，他明天要上班 <span] 妈妈：小明，你看，妹妹考100分，你才50分8 z- x* S1 R# |. d7 @9 F2 N
小明：我是照你的话做的; u L# |6 B2 b7 j- `
妈妈：我说了什麼？
8 O; o( ^* g" n0 J* w6 P/ d小明：你说我只要有妹妹的一半就很好了 <span] 小外甥女刚上一年级，有次语文考试得了74分，
8 W. @. q8 w" j: \* _, C; `她拿成绩单回来的时候她爸妈很生气，
- d% d3 e/ l5 D2 q4 O6 p6 [ F就问你为什么只考了74] 老师：“] 老师：现在上‘急救课’“先做口对口人工呼吸”“这样重复做，会怎样？”/ [5 E3 j! \2 _4 A* h
小明：有人会告你性骚扰 <span] 小明放学回到家就问：麻麻，你不说女人都喜欢被夸吗？( y, w$ W9 ^8 x: |+ `3 Y6 U
妈妈说：是啊，为什么这么问？ N% y: V8 X$ ] g% C& z& f
小明沮丧着说：今天老师穿着超短裙来上课，我就夸老师，你的内裤好漂亮啊！
. e8 ]! R! a0 P- \7 |; G a/ j3 ^7 v然后，老师就给我撵出去了！！！
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大家每人发一个关于教师段子在跟贴后面，一起用关于教师的笑话来庆祝伟大的教育工作者的节日。
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